In Our Own Words will convey the true stories and real life experiences of home attendants who have graduated from the 45-Hour Dementia Home Care Training course. For this issue, Adrian Sowdager shares his experience with Nancy Lee Hendley, Dementia Care Trainer.

Adrian Sowdagar graduated from the 45-hour Dementia Home Care Training at the Alzheimer’s Association on March 26, 2008. Since then he has been working as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) at a skilled nursing and rehabilitation facility in the Bronx. The following is an excerpt from a conversation that I had with Adrian.

Nancy: When I met you, you were unhappy with your job.

Adrian: Yes, I was thinking if I get hit one more time, I am going to quit!

Nancy: You seem to have come a long way since then.

Adrian: Yes, I love my job now. I love the residents that I work with.

Nancy: How did things change for you? Now you are taking care of more people, with more needs and demands.

Adrian: I really learned how to communicate in the 45-hour training. I know how to observe a person; I create care routines based on their needs.

Nancy: Can you tell me more about observation?

Adrian: It usually takes me about a week to understand a person’s preferences. I watch them carefully. I ask myself, how can I help this person? What is the best way to change their clothing, assist them with eating, shaving, etc.? It is surprising how much you can accomplish even when the person can only communicate by saying yes or no.

Nancy: Can you give me an example?

Adrian: One of the men that I work with likes to have his belt already threaded through the belt loops before he puts on his trousers. That is not the way that I prefer to get dressed. I pull on my pants and then put on the belt. But my job is to fi gure out how he likes it, and then do it that way every time. Doing things the way he is used to makes him feel secure.

Nancy: Any other examples?

Adrian: One lady in my care would not eat. She refused food. I sat with her. She began to call me her husband. I introduced eating to her by going along with her idea and suggesting that we eat together. Eating with her husband was normal for her. Now she eats with me.

Nancy: And you don’t mind if she thinks you are her husband?

Adrian: No, some of my co-workers made fun of me. But I said, “No, this is my job. You see, she is eating.”

Nancy: That is awesome, anything else?

Adrian: Yes, one man was swatting at me when I tried to change him. I backed off, to give him some space. Later I knocked at the door to try again. I was able to find a way to hold his hand and look into his eyes. At first, he looked angry, like he was ready to punch me, but then I could see that he was just really sad. I asked him if I could change him then, and he said yes.

Nancy: You have really connected.

Adrian: Yes, and I could not have been this way before the training. I would have been rough; I had no idea.

Nancy: But you do now! How do you feel about the work that you do?

Adrian: I love it. When I see the residents all showered and clean at the end of the day, I feel good. Sometimes after I clock out, I just sit with them and listen. They have so much to say.

Nancy: Thank you Adrian. Thanks for your good work.

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